Via StyleBistro.com
Amiright, Elena Lenina?
Showing posts with label what?. Show all posts
Showing posts with label what?. Show all posts
Friday, May 18, 2012
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
Bikini'd Damsels
I still vividly remember fighting with my father over a tankini when I was in 6th grade. It was the weekend before our class pool party, and anyone who was anyone was going to be showing their midriff—some girls even had bikinis (the scandal!). So it was of the utmost importance I AT LEAST had a tankini, but Papa Megan didn't like the idea of his little girl being anything but "covered up."
It's a bad sign when this memory was sparked by a bikini from Free People:
My father would like the direction this is going in, but I'm...befuddled. It's a bikini top, so you're obviously going to be showing a lot of skin. But Free People draws the line at collar bone/cleave? And who wants this tan line, anyway? I could go running and have more of my neckline exposed in a sports bra than in this swimsuit.
Unless this is some kind of marketing genius where Free People realizes this is where most women burn the easiest, so this is what you wear after your chest has turned lobster-red. It's perfect, actually—you hide your lobster cleave while it calms down and wear this shiny flesh colored fabric swatch over it. MISDIRECTION, DAMSELS.
Okay, never mind, best swimsuit ever!
It's a bad sign when this memory was sparked by a bikini from Free People:
My father would like the direction this is going in, but I'm...befuddled. It's a bikini top, so you're obviously going to be showing a lot of skin. But Free People draws the line at collar bone/cleave? And who wants this tan line, anyway? I could go running and have more of my neckline exposed in a sports bra than in this swimsuit.
Unless this is some kind of marketing genius where Free People realizes this is where most women burn the easiest, so this is what you wear after your chest has turned lobster-red. It's perfect, actually—you hide your lobster cleave while it calms down and wear this shiny flesh colored fabric swatch over it. MISDIRECTION, DAMSELS.
Okay, never mind, best swimsuit ever!
Friday, February 24, 2012
Damsels Speak...Words
I'm not quite sure what to make of some of Nasty Gal's spring shorts. So I decided to express myself through the art of spoken word.
Put.
It.
Away.
Okay, those were three words, but you're buying what I'm selling.
(FYI I'm not selling these).
It.
Away.
Okay, those were three words, but you're buying what I'm selling.
(FYI I'm not selling these).
Friday, February 17, 2012
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
A Bicycle Built for Damsels
I subscribe to the fantasy of having my future home look like Anthropologie. I admit this freely, and to anyone who asks/is near me when I'm shopping at Anthropologie. I realize a hundred billion other girls feel this way, but I don't care. It's mildly kitschy, extremely cute and fantastically colorful. Sue me.
So every once in a while, instead of drooling over the clothes or the accessories, I allow myself to click over to the "House & Home" tab on the homepage and browse furniture and other knick knacks. Partly to wile away my time, partly to gasp at exorbitant prices. But wholly to covet.
That is, until I stumbled into the "Hobbies & Leisure" section.
What in the what? When did Anthropologie start making bicycles and selling them for--wait for it--$798. And that's the cheap one! There's another, even plainer, bicycle that costs $1,998:
I'm sorry Anthro, but if you're going to sell me on a bicycle when I'm already a terrible bike rider, it better have rainbow streamers and flying unicorns painted on it, or some such nonsense. You're close with the flowers and the wooden box, but no cigar. I'm severely disappointed--Mama needs her kitsch.
Oh, wait, never mind, Damsels:
So every once in a while, instead of drooling over the clothes or the accessories, I allow myself to click over to the "House & Home" tab on the homepage and browse furniture and other knick knacks. Partly to wile away my time, partly to gasp at exorbitant prices. But wholly to covet.
That is, until I stumbled into the "Hobbies & Leisure" section.
What in the what? When did Anthropologie start making bicycles and selling them for--wait for it--$798. And that's the cheap one! There's another, even plainer, bicycle that costs $1,998:
Oh, wait, never mind, Damsels:
Friday, February 3, 2012
Not Safe For Damsels
Happy Friday, Damsels! It's the end of the week, and you all deserve something so wonderful, so ridiculous, and so laugh out loud AWESOME that it will make this last week fly from your memories. Mainly because, when you see this, your brain will explode.
Are you ready? This is not safe for LIFE:
Are you ready? This is not safe for LIFE:
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