Cropped Damsels

I would say I like crop tops. I don't love them by any means, and I don't wear them personally. But if I see a girl that's rockin' one, I would definitely give her crop-props. If it's cute and she looks good, why should a sista hate?

But here's the thing Damsels -- most women do not rock a crop. Big is beautiful and all, but even an average-sized woman may want to steer clear of these tummy showers.

That's why I was half-amused/half-horrified when I saw this:

Via FreePeople.com

Not only is this top (let's face it) not that great to begin with, but now it's available in XL? Who are the women protesting that this wasn't in an XL? Who thought to themselves, "How unfair! This unattractive crop top with an unflattering stripe pattern DOESN'T come in my size?? I SEEK JUSTICE! I will never shop here again!"

And Free People was all, "Wait, don't fret! See? It's now available in XL!! Just like you wanted! And we're telling you with a pink font and an exclamation point! DON'T LEAVE US!"

Dramatization aside, I would like to meet the confident/blind women who want this top, of all shapes and sizes.

For serious.

Damsels Dislike Your Fancy Pants

I love Anthropologie. Like, if Anthropologie was a guy, I would be creepily obsessive and stalk his facebook all the time. Or we'd be exclusively, seriously dating. On our way to getting married, meeting the in-laws and house-hunting seriously dating. I'd give up all other stores for Anthropologie, til death do us part.

But part of the reason I love this store is because sometimes they get wackadoo with their selections. For all the pretty dresses and breezy blouses, Anthro can definitely throw in some crazy trends.

Enter the Fancy Pant.

Via Anthropologie.com 

Fancy Pants are becoming a huge trend with their questionable textiles, unflattering cuts and lots and lots of prints. And I'm hating on them hardcore, whether they're these awful striped legging-hybrids, or these hideous plaid cords:

Via Anthropologie.com 

I'd just like to point out that THESE ARE NOT PAJAMAS. THESE ARE HIGH-WAISTED PLAID CORDUROY ANKLE-RISE PANTS TO BE WORN WHEN PEOPLE CAN SEE YOU.

Sorry for all the yelling, but these are offensive, right? Well, not as offensive as THESE: