A City on a Damsel?

Lost cities like Atlantis and El Dorado always fascinated me as a child. The romantic notion that an entire culture had been lost and could be rediscovered was exciting, and a part of me still fantasizes that someday I'll stumble into some National Treasure-esque adventure that will snowball into me being chased by bad guys/finding important historical treasures/obvi saving the world. This city, however, is one I wish I had never uncovered:

Via TopShop.com

My dear damsels, this shift maxi dress by Unique** costs $270 and features a "gold city print" smack dab over your lady parts.

And in case you thought this was some freak accident that somehow slipped past the designer and was pushed through by a spiteful intern hell-bent on making women look like frumpy pillow cases while drawing attention to our uteri with images of metropolitan infrastructure, it also comes in a shorter version:

Via TopShop.com

And they say lightening never strikes twice. I think I speak for both myself and my oh-so-fashionable uterus when I vote we find each and every one of these dresses...and burn them all.