Damsel in a Dress: Hummana Hummana: Man-sels for Sale

Oh yeah. We're having a special on Man-sels. Today only, buy one, get one free! You heard me right, two Man-sels for the price of one! We're practically giving them away over here!

Who are the fine pieces of man-flesh, you ask? I'm glad you brought it up. Because it brings up more things, and I really enjoy going on tangents. Valentine's Day is coming up, if you didn't know, Damsels. And, along with all the other corny and romantic things produced for and on said holiday, nothing pleases me quite like the V-Day movie.

This year, many films are galivanting around as V-Day movies: on a serious note, The Vow, on the other side of the scale, This Means War with Reese Witherspoon.

Here's the part where you say, where are the Man-sels, Damsel? With a slightly higher voice than necessary. Hey, I promise, there's a rhyme to my reason. Just go with it.

I'm excited for Reese. She is back to being flirty and fun, which is how we all grew to love her (Legally Blonde), which isn't to say we didn't like her in Walk the Line (of course we did) or we didn't ever mean to go to Water for Elephants (we so meant to go, it was just timing issues, I promise!). But this just feels so natural. And, she just seems so happy in her personal life, that I just want to applaud everything she does, from red-carpet appearances to shopping with her daughter.

Also, while we're here, I'd like to say a few choice words about Chelsea Handler. Can the girl not be in something? She is everywhere, and it is not a good thing. It is like when Krispy Kreme was like, "OMG people like us again! Let's put stores everywhere, and then also put stores in people's houses! Then, let's put stores directly in people's mouths - it's so conveniently genius!" That is what Chelsea Handler is doing - overextending herself, and really, her welcome in American homes. I mean, she has her show, which has its moments. Then she has books, and she hosts the VMAs (she bombed it, btw), and then she gets a spin-off show about her show, then she gets a show about her book that stars her and that girl from That 70s Show - who no one cared about because Mila Kunis was there - then when we thought maybe ONE THING would be sacred, she's in movies too. I mean, can we have ONE THING, Chelsea? Apparently not.

Double the Man-sel, double the fun? Yes, we've arrived. This Means War has two hunky men in a compromising situation. I actually do think this movie looks really promising. It stars Chris Pine (of Star Trek and Princess Diaries 2 fame. You didn't let that slip, did you? Yes, I said Princess Diaries 2, and I'm not ashamed! I loved that movie - so much sexual tension, all caused by Chris Pine, so don't even go there with me.) and Tom Hardy - I have no clue who Tom Hardy is, but I know from this movie he can handle a gun, and a suit with a skinny tie, and that's really all I need to know. (If you're curious, IMDB says he's been in Inception, Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy, Sucker Punch, and in post-production, The Dark Knight Rises - gearing up for a big year, aren't you, Tom?)